Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Another Proud Parent Moment

This morning my 5 year old gave me a picture that he made at preschool yesterday. He was very proud of his work so I decided to hang it on the fridge. I took one plain magnet and it wasn't strong enough to hold the picture. So I took the next available magnet. A Coors Light magnet.

"Look mommy, my picture has the beer magnet."

Proud parent moment #261 is brought to you by your local Coors brewing company.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Elements

While on vacation last year, we found place mats that had the Periodic Table of the Elements. My husband suggested that we buy them for the kids. They have been using them for a little while now.

The kids like to quiz me at dinner.

"Mom, what is Fe?"

"Iron. Now finish your rice."

"What is Ba?"

"Barium. Now please finish your rice."

These dinner quizzes have become regular occurrences in our house. I mentioned it while I was talking with my sister on the phone today. She laughed. I explained that my 5 year old's favorite element is Berkelium. He likes that one because its symbol is Bk just like Burger King.

My 6 year old likes #112 for two reasons. The first is that I don't know this element (He likes to stump me). The name is Ununbium and the symbol is Uub. The second reason he likes it that it's the last one. It's the highest number on the chart.

Does anyone else have kids who have favorite elements?

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Brush Your Teeth

Today I was at the mall. I was waiting in line behind 2 women and a girl about 12 years old. They were talking and looking at makeup. I was trying to eavesdrop mind my own business when I heard one lady say to the girl, "Show me your teeth." The girl smiled wide to show her teeth. The lady said, "You need to brush your teeth today."

Today? As in not every day?

Counting Down

One week from today I am leaving for Japan. I'll be gone for two weeks. That's two weeks where I don't have to pay bills, I don't have to take my kids to baseball practice, I won't have a meeting with the principal, I won't have to drive anywhere.

We are going to visit my husband's family. We're going with them to the beach for a few days while we're there. My inlaws also wanted to take the grandkids to Disneyland. So the last 3 days of the trip will be spent at Tokyo Disneyland.

I'm very excited and also a little stressed. The day after we return is my son's birthday. The day after that is his birthday party at Chuck. E. Cheese. And the day after that is Easter. Then I'm going to need another vacation!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Dear Pick Up Truck Owner

Dear Owner of the blue pick up truck that parked next to me in the grocery store parking lot today,

That was such a nice bumper sticker you had on the back window, "Who lit fire to your tampon?" Next time, I wouldn't recommend leaving your dog in the back of your pick up truck. Anyone could come by and poison it.

Just a thought.


PS I have a hunch that you might still be single, no?

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I Need to Buy A Cup

Baseball season has started. This is my 6 year old's second season. He is no longer an itty bitty T-ball player. He is a great big baseball player. OK, so it's coach pitch. And the kids get 5 strikes before they're out. But still, it's a lot tougher than baseball.

And the point is that his a great big baseball player now. I thought he could wear the same uniform as last year. The shirt still fits. The socks still fit. The pants kinda fit. I knew that he outgrew the cleats. We bought new ones 2 weeks ago. The one thing that I didn't have him try in advance was the cup. And it didn't fit. He is supposed to wear it for practice and definitely for the first game tomorrow (don't worry, tomorrow's game is already cancelled. Why is it cancelled? For snow! What? You think it doesn't snow in Seattle?! OH, you must be from Seattle if you think that!).

I helped my son get dressed for practice. I dug the cup out of the bottom of his underwear drawer. I helped him step into it and pulled it up so the band was around his waist. He started squirming. He couldn't breathe. The cup had cut off circulation to his body. He was turning blue. It was too tight! There was no way he could wear it. So I helped him take it off and finish getting dressed. I thought, "I'll have to buy one before his game this weekend."

On Friday I was running errands. "Buy a cup" was on my list. I went to 2 small sporting stores. One had cups, but only in adult sizes. Those were more like a shield for my 6 year old. The other didn't have any. Then I went to Sports Authority. At first I only saw adult sizes in the baseball section. These were $30-$40! And yes, still way too big. But this was Sports Authority. If they didn't have cups for 6 year olds, where was I going to find one?! I saw a young kid working in the store. A male young kid. I said, "I need to buy a cup."

He looked at me funny.

"For my son. He's 6."

Then he wouldn't look at me anymore. He pointed to front of the store and mumbled something about the front wall. His face was getting red. I'm not sure if he was laughing at me or I had embarrassed him. Either way, I hurried to the front of the store to continue my own embarrassment.

I found the wide selection of cups in the front of the store by the free weights. Who knew to look there?! Then I had to find the ones marked, "youth." I wasn't sure what size to buy, but I knew the one I bought last year didn't fit and it said "20-26" on it. I figured that I needed bigger numbers. (This must be what's it like for a dad to have to go shopping for his daughter's training bra.) I sorted through a few packages and decided on a youth size "large." I know you must be thinking the same thing that I'm thinking.

"How can a 6 year old be a size large?" In the youth sizes, they had small or large. No medium. The next set is "teen" and then there are "adult." So size large it is!

My son tried it on yesterday. It was a little big, but much more comfortable than the first cup. And this time he could breathe while wearing it.

Whew! And it was $15, not $30 :)

Friday, March 13, 2009

Not Me

Some bloggers have "Not Me" Mondays. Today, I'm doing a "Not Me" Friday.

I didn't forget the tooth fairy last night. My son didn't lose a tooth at school yesterday, put it under his pillow at night and then wake up to find the tooth still there. That would never happen in my house.

I didn't send my 5 year old to preschool this week even though he had a bad cough and runny nose. I didn't give him some cough medicine in the morning and then wait for my cell phone to ring when it wore off.

I didn't go to my bank's website several times a day to check if my tax return was there yet even though they said it would take a week.

I didn't write in my blog while sitting cross-legged on the chair so that my foot was asleep. After my foot was completely asleep and my blog entry was done, I didn't stand up only to fall on my face and bruise my chin. And my husband didn't laugh at me.

I didn't encourage my 5 year old to play video games so that I could get some things done around the house.

I didn't vacuum around a pile of coats on the dining room floor.

Yup, those are all things that I would never do.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Whipped Cream

Yesterday I waited at the bus stop for my first grader to get off the bus. Another mom was there with her 3 year old daughter. The little girl was so excited to see there was still snow on the ground from the day before. She picked some up and said, "Look mommy, whipped cream!"
The mom said, "No, honey it's snow."
"Yes, it's snow and whipped cream!" said the little girl.
The mom explained that the little girl thinks all of the snow is really whipped cream that falls from the sky. It's like a new kind of manna. Messy but good!

Monday, March 9, 2009


As soon as I finished dinner tonight my doorbell rang. It was my neighbor. He had an invitation for me. To a couples Passion party this Saturday. This neighbor moved in less than a year ago. I don't know him (or anyone else in that house) very well. Certainly not well enough that I feel comfortable attending a Passion Party. Especially a couples Passion Party. I don't think I know any of my friends well enough for a couples passion party!

Here's the invitation. I erased the name, address and phone numbers. But let me know if you want to attend. I'd be happy to pass your info along. Oh, and he included his cell phone too. Ya know, in case there was a couples passion emergency and you needed to reach him right away.

So who wants to attend?
Can you imagine?
Attending one of these parties?
In mixed company?
With your neighbors?
As you browse through the catalog you hear the couple next to you, "Hey honey that's like the one we got last time. This time let's order an extra large."

OMG. I really didn't know what to say to this guy. I felt dumb. I said, "so this isn't for kids?" He nodded. "Well, I don't think I can find a babysitter."

Things I found today

I decided to run some errands after lunch. I found this out my back door.
It's March! In Seattle! It's supposed to be warm! Not snowing!

After dinner I went in the bathroom to get a tissue. This is what I found in the bathroom.

Yes, that is a sink filled with water, soap, dirt, hot wheels cars, and a towel. I'm sure the wet towel is very useful.
And this last picture is what I found on the memory card that was in my camera. It seems that my 5 year took a few pictures of his own. Great close up.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Burger King Emergency

I thought this youtube video couldn't be real. It's Funny and disturbing at the same time.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Dear Waste Management

Dear Waste Management (our wonderful garbage collection service),

Thank you so much for your optimistic view on the "weather event" last Thursday. I understand those flurries can be deadly especially when you have an enormous garbage truck on the roads. Those things are so light, I see how it can be easy to lose traction, especially with that whole half an inch of accumulation. I just don't know how the buses managed to pick up the kids and take them to school that day. You were very wise to take the day off. And not come out to pick up the trash for an entire week.

The offer to let your customers put out "extra" bags of trash next to the designated trash cans was a great idea. The squirrels, rats and other animals really appreciate it. I truly enjoyed cleaning up pieces of trash strewn all over the sidewalk and streets as a result of the free trash buffet in our neighborhood last night. And the rain just made it that much more fun.

It was nice of you to remind me of the time back in December when we got 8 inches of snow and the trash wasn't picked up for 3 weeks. But you still charged us for a full month of trash "service." The way you collect trash and recycle gives new meaning to the word, "service."

Thanks again. Can't wait to see what creative excuses ideas you have for spring.

Mrs. Cookie

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

A New Kind of Organization

My 6 year old with the broken told me that he doesn't go outside for recess very much anymore. Since he can't do many things on the playground, he has been spending recess time in the nurse's office. I asked, "what do you in the nurse's office?"

"I play with the doll there. The one with all the parts and you can put them back together," he said.

"Oh the one where you can take out the organs and put them back?" I asked.

"Yes, I like to organize them," was his reply.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Bunco Night

Every 6 weeks a group of my friends have a ladies night. We get together and play Bunco which is really a good excuse to eat, drink and gossip. We rotate houses. I hosted last February. So it was my turn to host this weekend.

My husband took the kids out to a cub scout banquet ceremony meeting thing (I didn't ask). I had 2 hours to get ready. I had been cleaning and organizing all week. Really all I had left to do was prepare some food, set up tables, and vacuum. What do you think happened? Yup, the vacuum died. It sounded like a jack hammer in my living room. I tried to use it anyway. Then the house was overwhelmed with the smell of burning rubber (probably the belt).

I opened the windows and turned on fans instead of vacuuming. Bunco was still a lot of fun. The smell went away and no one seemed to notice the lack of vacuuming.

I'm going vacuum shopping tomorrow.