Dear Cashier at the grocery store last night,
I understand that being friendly is part of your job. But while I was waiting in line, something didn't seem quite right. The woman in front of me was purchasing one thing and one thing only, a pregnancy test. When a woman walks into the grocery store at 10pm and the only thing she is buying is a pregnancy test, she is not in the mood for small talk. When you look down and see the lonely pregnancy test on the conveyor belt, do not look up at her and smile and ask how she's doing tonight. I can tell you that she's not doing well. She also probably hates all men at this moment too. She does not want to discuss the weather or the big cinco de mayo sale on avocados. She wants to get out of there as quickly and discreetly as possible. You can just assume that yes, she wants it in a bag and she does not want you to say, "Thank You Ms. X" as you are so well trained to do.
Please remember this etiquette when a woman comes in purchasing a lonely box of tampons at 10pm also. Or a packages of vagisil. This may also apply to anyone buying preparation H at 10pm as well.
PS No, it wasn't me purchasing a pregnancy test. Thank Goodness!